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Why You Should Meditate Before Sex….

As I mature and really take my intimate energy more seriously, I realize (and honor) the responsibility I have when it comes to clearing my mind and energetic field so that I can be present as well as reciprocal when I pop this pussy for a real nigga. I’ve spoken about how to arm yourself against partners with unhealed toxic energies who will use your Yoni as their personal dumping ground for all the shit that they carry around, but now is the time to also speak on the energy you bring to the bed (or wherever you choose to slang that Pwussy-this is a judgment free ministry) as well as the benefits of pressing reset on your mental so that you can be present and reciprocal for a maximum experience.

Meditation is the act of detaching into mentalmindfulness to bring higher clarity, awareness, and alignment with self. It allows individuals to obtain stability, emotionally calmness, and achieve a mentally clear state of being. By clearing the mind, chanting affirmations, and centering self; one is allowing themselves to open up for a cosmic experience.

Have you ever been in a situation where a nigga is trying to give you the wickedest slam but you can’t get into it because your mind is on other shit?

Your job?

Your kids?


Anxiety? That hating ass bitch in your building?

& any other shit that hasn’t absolutely nothing to do with the daaaaaack you are trying to experience distraction free??

You can’t be present in bed because you are so stuck in your head and you’re not only fawking up the moment but also the glorious flashbacks at work that you are also worthy of receiving!

So how do we meditate?

Meditation is not some picture perfect zen existence all the time. Especially when you’re just getting started. It also doesn’t need to be done in long periods. I like to liken meditation with watching your thoughts drift by you like clouds. Allow them the space to get out because a lot of times they just want to be recognized-even if you gotta tell them that they aren’t welcome. When you hold space for your thoughts (while placing encouraging affirmations in their place), you not only press reset to the spaces in your mental and energetic fields, you also rev up your bravado and confidence to go take that daaaaack.

Here’s a few tips with meditating:

  1. Sit comfortably on a cushion or a chair. Don't slouch, but your back doesn't need to be ramrod-straight either. At first, you may want to try sitting against a wall to support your back. Use extra pillows under your knees or anywhere else to make you comfortable.

  2. Try lying down, if sitting to meditate is unappealing. Miriam Austin, author of Meditation for Wimps, recommends lying on the floor with your calves and feet resting on a chair seat.

  3. Put on music, if that helps to calm you before beginning to meditate. Turn it off once you begin.

  4. Set a digital (non-ticking) timer. Start with five minutes and work your way up to 10, then 15, and eventually 20. It will probably take weeks or months to lengthen the time you practice. Try not to put yourself on a schedule. Whatever your pace, it's fine.

  5. Breathe normally through your nose, with your mouth closed. Your eyes can be open or closed. Focus on the breath moving in and out of your nostrils, or on the rise and fall of your belly.

  6. When you notice your mind wandering, bring it gently back to the breath. Be careful not to drift off; this will be tempting, especially if you're lying down. While shutting off your mind is not the goal of meditation, neither is judging the meditative process. No matter what feelings or thoughts you have, simply bring your focus back to the breath again. And again.

Another reminder:

With all things that we are new at, shit takes time. Pace yourself and give yourself grace. Start with a minute a time and then work your way up. Also, it’s good to use chime music to help center you. Simply open up YouTube and type “Quick meditation chime music” and a Pandora’s Box will literally open up to you. I like to use “Sacral Chakra Chime Music” in the search bar as our sexual and sensual energy is governed by our Sacral Chakra. This is especially true when I am using the sex practice to manifest and boost my creativity as the sacral chakra also governs our creative energies. I utilize music for the Heart Chakra if I’m setting the stage for a real romantic mood.

Play around with sounds and chimes. Go with whatever allows you the space to free your mind so the daaaaaack can follow.

Let me know if you have any questions or concerns!

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