After Sex Green Flags

We don't talk enough about after sex green flags. Surprisingly, not many people know what they are. Especially in a world where we only shine the light on red flags in relationships.

Taking a micro approach to intimacy amongst people in the bedroom, I find discussing green flags after sex to be very interesting and sometimes amusing. This is because I usually see a totally different side of the person. When talking about relationship red flags, it's so easy to let off steam and mightily assert what you ain't having and what ain't going down on aisle 3.

But with intimacy and speaking on the things that you are accepting of, the demeanor, stance, vocabulary, and even tone of voice used when describing desires are totally different. You see a beautiful level of vulnerability when this topic is explored and I love that.

This is because to be accepting of a continuation of exchange after sex shows vulnerability, interest, and softening. When I think of the niggas I was just fucking and who I only focused on within the span of sex, I never desired anything post sex that was vulnerable or soft. The only thing I desired was for his ass to keep it the fuck moving out of my space. These were the days that I saw sex as a vehicle for release. A sexual extenuation of my love for working out and letting off steam. However, when I started my journey of seeing sex as an energy exchange and how serious I should take that shit (especially as a heaux who is going places), I noticed that my sexual exchanges were more grounded, vulnerable, intimate, and I actually enjoyed after sex energy. In fact, I craved it.

Again, this is when I began attracting and desiring a different type of partner. Because the type of partner who is on this level is mandatory. Partners who believe in or practice foreplay (real foreplay-not just them three raggedy ass Tootsie Roll licks) will most likely be aligned, able bodied, and willing to care for you after sex. If they aren't, you are wasting precious time and pwussy power). You must also be willing to show your vulnerability and intimacy to receive what he is giving and allow yourself to be cared for. If you aren't again you are hustling backwards.

This is also when I began doing the work to remove myself from my dominated masculine energy of animalistic pleasure to come over to my divine feminine side where I am cared for and handled warmly while simultaneously being allowed to nurture my partner in exchange. My sexual experiences have completed elevated and the extended version of riding each other's energetic wave is something that I look forward to. In fact, I always say that my lovers don't fuck me: they experience me. There's a difference. A huge difference.

So what do after sex green flags look like to you? Do you feel fulfilled after sex? Do you feel as though enough intimacy has exchanged between the two of you? How would you like to keep the fire burning?

A few of my after sex green flags are: conversation, comfortable silence, body rubs, spooning, compliments on the Gwaaak Gwaaak 50000 and Pwussy, laughter, music, light kisses, holding me, and letting lay my head on his chest.

These gestures not only strengthen the connection of you and your partner, but they are also a magical space that fully allows the divine masculine and feminine energy to connect and recharge off each other freely. Don't believe me? Just watch how you feel afterwards.

What are your after sex green flags?